The Story About My Stories
"Not Even There"
"Not Even There" began as a challenge for a contest. It was challenge in which the story had to contain the theme of water. Now, anybody who has ever met me knows that, for some reason, I am wired to automatically wonder about the twisted aspects of life. The parts of life that none of us want to talk about have always fascinated me. I wonder about what causes people to do things and act the way that they do. If you give me a challenge, like the theme of carnivals, I will go to the most twisted story of carnivals I can imagine. It's just how I am built.
So, my lovely readers, it should come as no surprise that I wrote about "friendship gone wrong."
However, though this was not cathartic in any way, I wrote about some things that have happened to me. Loneliness is a theme that permeates this story. One of the characters loses his mother and is left with his father, a drunk. When I was 17, my mother was in an accident. Her and my aunt were hit by a drunk-driver. She was in a coma for 3 months, three long months where we weren't sure she was going to make it. She did come back to us, but the brain damage had completely changed her. I never had my mom back again. I'm 46 now. I mean, she was physically there...but not there in any way the person that she was. One minute I had my best friend..my mom, and then in one minute, never again. I was left with a step-father who was an abusive drunk too. I am acquainted with loneliness, though not the way that David, in my story, is acquainted with it.
I also wrote about not being the most popular...not because I didn't have a good personality, but I felt like I didn't exist. I was blown away my senior year when the most popular girl in school wrote me and told me that she wished I would have asked her out. She was serious. still hard for me to believe. Self-esteem is not something that comes easy to me It's not that I didn't want to ask her out (we were friends and she was beautiful), but I just never thought she could be interested in me. I always felt like I was "not even there."
Just add in thoughts about a song by Phil Collins called "In the Air Tonight" and you have the story that I call "Not Even There" If you get a chance to pick it up and give it a read...I hope you enjoy it! Maybe if you drop by my Twitter page and ask me, and you're really nice about it, I might even give you a copy! :)